Mothers Against Violence

Who we are

Patsy McKie	Patsy McKie In 1999 my life changed dramatically when my son was shot and killed. Dorrie was a vibrant lad with a caring heart and an undying loyalty to his friends. In fact, his death really opened my eyes to how much he was loved by the people around him. A comment by one of his friends may say it all: "He cared more for me than my dad ever did". Until his death, my life - work, church, family - was ticking over nicely. I had raised six beautiful kids who were doing well in university, sport and other careers. When Dorrie was growing up, he was a much-appreciated pupil at school, with good reports that specifically commented on his character and his helpful attitude towards the younger children. But in his third year of college a change occurred. Life became serious. The brother of one of his friends who belonged to a gang was shot in the leg. Some time later, one of Dorrie’s friends was shot in the chest and arm over a silly issue about a bike – silly, but with grave consequences on the Manchester streets. A year later three fatal gang shootings occurred in one week, one of which took away my son. Dorrie, who had never been in trouble with the police in his life, became the centre of a police enquiry through his death. You do not raise kids without purpose, and I am convinced that you do not lose one of your kids without purpose either. For me, my pain and my faith became a window into Manchester society. After Dorrie’s death my house was filled with young people, parents and elderly people who lived in the neighbourhood. Some time later I met with a group of around fifteen mothers who were fearful for the lives of their children and who knew either a family member or a friend who had been a victim of gang shootings or other violent acts. Out of this, Mothers Against Violence was born. The deepest desire of Mothers Against Violence is to put something back into the community. Young people learn from adults. I want to know why, when they grow up, the gangs have such an attraction despite all the violence. I have learned a lot from listening. A gang is their family. There is oneness, acceptance, agreement, and togetherness in a gang, and often it is the only format of being listened to and being heard. The ‘Gangstop’ march that took place in Manchester in June 2002 was the result of a rising up within the community to aim for change. This was not an isolated event; it was the beginning of something new. When Gandhi marched in India for independence, when the mothers of Argentina marched for their missing sons, something happened in the course of history - suddenly, the world sat up. My involvement with Mothers Against Violence has brought me before a number of great men. Tony Lloyd, MP for Manchester, arranged a meeting with Prime Minister Tony Blair. We were listened to. We talked about moral values, about the social exclusion of young black men and children, about family matters. In Mothers Against Violence we come alongside grieving parents and parents who are concerned that their children will be caught up in gangs. We aim to go into schools and break the taboo about gangs and violence. We need to talk, and, much more importantly, we need to listen. I am still not really used to the idea that my son is not here. He is still so much part of our lives. But the loss we feel in our family has given me a great compassion for young men. I am interested in what moves them and what they think.
Angela Lawrence	Angela Lawrence I joined MAV back in 1999. I was told about a meeting after the shooting and killing of young men. I attended a meeting in hideaway there were lots of women some of them mothers from around the community. I attended several meetings and listened keenly to what was being said. I remember the first shooting in Moss Side of Julian he was a friend of mine and over the years I lost a number of friends to gun crime. Then I began to question what I was doing about it. I knew like lots of other people that I had a lot to say but there wasn’t any action behind my words. It was during the meetings that I felt led to become more involved and the rest, as they say is history. I am very passionate about what happens within our communities and I realise, as well as your voice there needs to be action and in stead of waiting for “them” to do something, I quickly realised the “them” was actually “Me!” I have put my words feelings and desire into action. I have enjoyed being involved with MAV, the highs have truly been remarkable and the commitment from all involved is what keeps us going. I am always asked “what is MAV doing?” It is never an easy question to answer, but for me its we are doing something, “ What About You?”
Jackie Flowers	Jackie Flowers My name is Jackie I work for a property management company and I have just completed a three year degree in Criminology and Contemporary Culture. I have three sons and a beautiful grandson. On the 23rd February 2004 our lives were shattered never to be the same again, my oldest son Fabian Flowers who at the time was 19 years old was shot and killed in the toilets of a night club in Stockport. After I lost my son I became a member of Mothers against Violence. (MAV) MAV are working in the community, trying to help vulnerable young people who may be at risk of getting into the “Gun Gang Culture!” Our aim is to make our communities a safer place for us all to live. As members we work to stop any other parents from going through the torment that many of us have experienced through the loss of our children. I would like my role in MAV to make a difference to just one young person and help stop just one mother from loosing her child.
Stacey Rowe	Stacey Rowe I became a member of MAV in January 2005. In January 2003 my boyfriend of two years was shot dead. He was missing for five weeks before his body was found buried in woodland. This was obviously a very traumatic experience, but it also became a turning point in my life. I came to the decision that I wanted to turn something negative into something positive by being there to help and support others who were going through a similar time. I wanted to try and educate young people about the dangers of gangs and guns and the affects they can have on people’s lives, as well as their own. I feel this is my tribute to the person I have lost. If I can help just one person then his death would not have been completely in vain. I have also gained a huge amount of support from other members of MAV. It has been a comfort to know that there are people that can appreciate what you have experienced, yet on the other hand it is very sad so many people have to lose someone they love in such a violent way. But hopefully together we can make a difference.
Ian Swanston	Ian Swanston In 1999 I was awoken by a phone call in the early hours of the morning it was a phone call that would change my life for good. I answered the phone and my sister simply said “Ian Junior is Dead!” My youngest brother who was twenty and ten years younger than me had been shot and killed in the street by an unknown gun man. The sad thing about this is that this was not the first young man shot dead in the street of Hulme and Moss Side by an unknown gun man - my younger brother was another one of many young men. I felt I had to do something about what was happening in the community I grew up in and the community I also love. Mothers Against Violence had been working in the community to help be the voice of those that want to see change in this community change for the better. I have now worked supporting MAV for over four years mentoring young people sharing my experiences with them. This has helped me bring purpose to the murder of my brother.
Robert Ralphs	Robert Ralphs I first came into contact with MAV as a researcher at the University of Manchester. My assumption about MAV, as I imagine many people think from its name, was that it was a strictly female organisation. After attending a meeting in February 2005 I discovered that it originated from a meeting held to discuss a growing concern with violent crime, especially gun crime in Manchester and the reason that MAV got its name was because only females turned up! This frustrates me because to have any chance of making an impact then all sections of our communities must get involved in trying to instigate positive changes and than means males and females alike. MAV provides a positive approach to dealing with violence with many members having suffering personal loss but showing by example how a negative personal experience can be turned into a positive. MAV has the potential to make a difference and I want to play my part in whatever way I can.

Profiles of some of the group.

Click on a name for their story.